A Special Someone
by Chandelier
Summary: Carter takes a break on a rough day at the ER.


A Special Someone  
  
"Carter."  
Someone touches my arm.  
"Coffee?"  
I look up. It's Chen.  
I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out. Deb smiles.  
"I'll meet you at Doc Magoo's in 5. You look like you need a break."  
This has become our little ritual recently. Something, or someone, seems to have brought myself and Deb Chen closer. Not that we weren't friends before.....  
I gratefully accept the invitation and head over to the lounge to grab my coat. Walking over to my locker I notice the name sticker on the outside is peeling off to reveal the name underneath. It reads "Lockhart".  
The sight of this gets me thinking. I wonder if anyone here misses Abby Lockhart. I'm not sure if I do or not, that name seems like something from another lifetime altogether. A time of bi-polar mothers and road trips to Oklahoma. The latter brings a faint smile to my lips. If we'd never gone down there together..... who knows if things would be different now. "The Lockhart Days" is what we call them. And this brings me to think about Luka. Apparently he never got jealous. I didn't understand that. I suppose I don't even now. It wasn't an issue I liked to push.  
  
I'm still brooding on this when I push my way into Doc Magoo's a few minutes later. There's no sign of Chen, so I order a coffee and take a seat at the counter. I glance over to a table by the window. A table where I shared coffee and cigarettes with a special someone last year. Again I start to think about all the changes over the past few months. That special someone has helped me through a lot and it's brought us closer to each other. So much closer that I'm a completely different person. But I still don't miss Abby Lockhart. That name belongs to the past now, and since I got married I've been trying to forget it ever existed. Abby Lockhart was a fool. Confused and mixed up, not knowing which way to turn and probably hurting not only herself but her friends too. Some could say this is a little harsh, but I knew her better than anyone else. And now I'm sat here in Doc Magoo's, alone. I can't help but think that there's something, or someone, missing. I've changed a lot but if went back a year maybe I would change a few things. A pointless relationship with a colleague at work, I could've done without that really. I made a mistake there but that someone I was talking about..... they never lost hope. They waited for me and I'm glad of it. But what if I've made a mistake. I've had too many failed relationships, too much hurt. I can't possibly go through all that again. I guess all this reminiscing about "The Lockhart Days" is messing my head up a bit. I should be looking to the future, but there's a certain something about the roadtrip, the chats by the Lake, that damn bridesmaid's dress! I won't forget those moments but I need to move on. This new life will take a little getting used to but I'm going to give it my best shot. Let Abby Lockhart go. I shouldn't miss her. I don't miss her.  
  
"I'm really sorry, I got held up waiting for an X-ray."  
I'd been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't even noticed Deb arrive by my side. I look at the coffee going cold by my elbow.  
"Deb, I'm feeling a bit... off. I'm gonna head back over to work and ask if I can take a sickie."  
"Wait. I found someone who's been looking for you."  
As Deb moves aside I can see someone running across the road towards the diner. They push open the door, their eyes find mine, and in an instant I know I'll be OK. They smile and make their way over to the counter.  
"Carter," they say, grinning. "I thought I'd never catch up with you! You OK? You look a bit broody!"  
I smile and answer, "John. I'm fine, really. Everything's OK now you're here."  
"That's good, Abby. Come on, I'll walk you back over."  
Deb pushes us towards the door, "Go on Dr and Nurse Carter, you've got patients! Tell Weaver I'll be back in 10 mintues."  
I turn and smile as I head out the door with my husband thinking, "No. I don't miss Abby Lockhart one little bit. I'm Abby Carter and that's how things should be." 


End file.
